Yea. It crossed my mind, but I was trying not to go there.
I've been trying to look inside, but it's like searching for a light switch in the dark.
For what it's worth, I'm unearthing a few things after this experience and I actually think I know where to start now when it comes to the "work" that I need to do.
I've also decided to cut out the non-monog scene. Full of land mines. And maybe instead of taking a break, I should keep trying. When I go long breaks without interacting with women, it seems I forget what these red flags are, or I think "this one isn't so bad."
"Normal" girls don't seem at all receptive to me, and I end up with the one that is excited about me. Looks like that strategy is not working well for me.
Mate, you just keep and keep getting into relationships with dysfunctional women with abandonment issues and then try to “solve” the problems.
Another BPD girl after another BPD girl. Just this one is the quiet one.
Getting anxious if you don’t contact her for a day? That’s huge abandonment issues right there.
Push pulling you with “let me know if you need space”? That’s BPD behaviour.
You are on an emotional roller coaster when you like her and then you argue. That’s not a healthy relationship.
Instead of “solving” the next girl, look inside and ask why you keep falling for dysfunctional women?
Yea. It crossed my mind, but I was trying not to go there.
I've been trying to look inside, but it's like searching for a light switch in the dark.
For what it's worth, I'm unearthing a few things after this experience and I actually think I know where to start now when it comes to the "work" that I need to do.
I've also decided to cut out the non-monog scene. Full of land mines. And maybe instead of taking a break, I should keep trying. When I go long breaks without interacting with women, it seems I forget what these red flags are, or I think "this one isn't so bad."
"Normal" girls don't seem at all receptive to me, and I end up with the one that is excited about me. Looks like that strategy is not working well for me.
I get it, man. “Normal” girls bore me to death. I just want to “abuse” their love and then dump them.
That drive for excitement, something, anything that makes me feel alive.
But then the damage control and self-preservation impulse, I just avoid all relationships all together now.