First Daygame Date

I had my first NYC daygame date yesterday. I’m shocked, myself.

This was Approach #2 here.

The texting was super straightforward. Lot of enthusiasm on her part.

I showed my texts to the game brotherhood, and got some feedback. There is a phrase I use, which I think I borrowed from Nash.

“I’m curious to hear more from you.”

I thought it was good. To me, I’m the evaluator and I’m curious to see if this is someone I want to spend time with. Pancake and Kvothe pointed out to me that this line isn’t good. She should be curious about me, and I should be leading. I’ve used this a lot, and generally to move things forward depending on the flow of conversation.

I actually had another text thread that didn’t go as “planned”, using the same line and that’s what brought up the conversation.

I thought about it, and I should probably be moving away from text guides and examples, and thinking through the context a bit more.

I was thinking/worrying how it was so easy to text/pull if the girl is a “Yes” girl, but as soon as I get a little “maybe”, I’m completely thrown for a loop.

Back to the date. I invited her to the bar right next to my place. When she arrived I stood up, greeted her with a hug, and guided her to our spot.

This is the most normal and attractive girl I’ve been on a date with in a minute. She’s a runner, used to do circus, into sports, and hangs with an older crowd of people. She’s 10 years younger than me. Yay, Daygame.

It was pretty normal date conversation. I didn’t sexualize much or at all for that matter. It didn’t feel necessary. The few times that I did, it seemed it went right over her head, or she pretended it did, so I just left it. Thinking back to the approach, I did not sexualize at all. Which I know I need to work on. There were a few times where she said she was glad I stopped her. We exchanged some flirty glances a few times.

She did mention the last guy she dated was a polyamorous guy, and it’s not something she’s looking to repeat, supposedly. I did not ask enough about this! I have so many questions sometimes! But I let her speak about her experience. Apparently it was one sided, meaning she wasn’t dating anyone during there time together, but I should follow up the next time I see her. I told her I’ve dated polyamorous women before, and I would again, depending on the person. She has done online, but doesn’t do it anymore because it was a waste of time. Maybe I’m the first person to approach her, and I think it fits into the Rom-Com narrative thing that she’s into.

My apartment is steps away, but for some reason I wasn’t ready to invite her over. It felt too fast, for me. It also felt too easy. I’ll let it build up some. Part of me was thinking about how I’m not going to learn anything from getting the easy “Yes” layup. Part of me was being a pussy.

I walked her to the train, and she definitely wanted me to kiss her. She stopped well before the actual station, we chatted, hugged, and then she tried to enter a building that was not the subway. I took her hand, and was like “Where are you going? The train is over here” as I walked her to the correct place. Then I pulled her into me. Lovely lips. Yes, I like to kiss.

I was tired from a long week. I went home and crashed.

I woke up to a text that said she made it home and that she had a lovely time.

I’d like to see her again. However, I also need to keep approaching. I have a lot to learn.

UPDATE: Pinged her for a second date. No response. Keep it moving.